2017 and Apologies

It has been a beautiful year

A distorted three hundred and sixty-five days

Broken glasses of the same exquisite champagne

Give me a bucket, let me pour my soul from it

 

This year

I almost lost myself this year

We did lose a lot this year

Fuck the Ponzi and the pyramids

That we tried to build

And the stories

That we told our friends that did not include

Our heritage and the ones that touched our lives

But didn’t stay too long to

Meet our children and know our wives

They now dwell in heaven’s castles.

 

Who is going to get me another Helen?

Or Joseph? Or Temi or Linda or Jenny my lady?

Who is going to get us another Chidi?

Who is going to get us another Roli?

You’re all past heaven’s gates now and you probably

Have all the angels looking on in envy

Come back kings and queens! We miss you already!

You all were way too young, you weren’t ready!

We miss you.

 

To the ones who are married

And your husband decides to beat you just because he is tired

And for the ones who are in love

And your lover kicks your belly

Because he thinks another man is involved.

If he hits you this year,

If your husband hits you this year,

Then I hope that coward dies

And when you turn into a widow

Remember to kiss on your children’s eyes

Tell them to see the world for what it really is

And not let anyone categorize them as weird and funny kids

 

So I apologize

 

For the days I should have called

For the days that you were bored

For the times you needed my attention

For these past hectic sessions

I apologize

 

Not for the fact that I loved you

But for badly missing the past you

The you that I hugged

The you that I loved

The you that said while we kissed

“No tongues involved”

That you. I apologize.

 

All of a sudden, my hands had become legs

Like a rat, I ran on all fours

I apologize for my fears

We had to commandeer your stuff

I pray Gog forgives me and my friends

My apologies to your landlord

And I apologize to alcohol.

Im sure that vodka be depressed from the way I abuse it.

I apologize.

To the orphans and the cripples.

And I apologize to the widows.

God’s blessings go through your windows,

And doors,

Just keep them open with your mind and all.

 

I apologize to my dreams.

I apologize to the system.

I apologize in advance to all the fuck yous I am going to be saying next year.

I apologize for when I used that shitty sentence,

My heart was senseless,

My brain was beating up my patience,

Anger was relentless.

I apologize.

 

You thought who loved who?

I apologize for another,

Yeah, I apologize for a brother.

He won’t say sorry now so I’ll just do it for him.

He’s slower to repent like his conscience is on lean.

 

I apologize for the world; I apologize for your neighbour.

I apologize for my tribe as I apologize for my crime.

I apologize for the government,

Im still apolitical, forgive my involvement

Just put down the gun and let Nigeria be one.

I apologize for the economy.

She is a bitch fucking up the lot of me.

Henry said he hadnt been ‘broker’ this year.

I apologize for the year.

 

I apologize to myself.

I apologize for the stereotype.

It still haunts me too,

I haven’t gotten rid of it myself.

 

I apologize for the suicide bombers

The girls in the North,

We may never know how much they were bothered.

I apologize for their tears,

I apologize to their peers,

I apologize to the sick; May God grant you strength.

I apologize to the rich,

You know we’d get our Aston soon right?

And surpass you soon enough, we might.

I took some time this year, 2018 okay? I promise.

I apologize.

 

To my momma, I love you.

To my father, I miss you.

To my family I’d selectively kiss you

On the cheek.

And if I purposely miss your name while I speak,

Im so sorry.

 

I apologize.

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